Pretty is, as Pretty does...

What do you do when you don’t know what to do.  That’s a little how I felt yesterday.  Charlie B (bumble b, brayden) all of those sweet baby names we call him turned 6 months yesterday and in these glorious days its just flown by to fast.  He eats big boy food, he laughs all the time, he nuzzles me quite frequently, and all of these things make me realize I don’t know what to do because all I want to do is freeze time.  I am so intrigued by my babies.  Kayleigh who is 8 going on 18 is constantly teaching me things now.  Things I probably once knew myself but have seemed to forget.  She’s intelligent, she’s brave, she’s tender-hearted, she’s all girl (but she did save me from a spider the other day with her flip flop).  Everyone realizes how fast time goes by.  I think as milestones approach or big days as you might say you tend to really focus on time.  Time is fragile.  As I get older I understand more that this time right now, this moment is important.  Shoot, every moment is important but tomorrow or yesterday is not the now and can’t be changed or made as of yet so I’m trying to focus on the now and how that now can impact my family.  There are so many little things recently I have really seemed to enjoy, actually in depth about how much they mean to me.  I love getting to spend daily car rides in the morning with my baby girl.  Normally after dropping her brother off I get to really hear about her, and its all about her.  Time use to be all about her, but now she’s learned to share her love and attention.  She tells me about her days, she asks me my opinion, she really opens up to me and I enjoy that.  I pray that she continues to stay that way and through life and through all the “nows” she always knows I’m here.  Charlie B watches my every move and from now until forever I realize that, that’s what our children do.  They watch our every move.  They learn and grow from us.  They one day may turn into there own individual person but parents have such an impact.  I want to be their “now” impact.  I want to show them that I am their no matter what, that my love subsides all besides their love for God.  I want them to know that those sweet kisses I give them, or how they may come to be for advice will never go away.  I enjoy the “nows” with them.  I enjoy simple things in these “nows”.  I enjoy getting done with dinner early to lay down with my husband and enjoy a movie once the kids are off to bed.  I enjoy sitting on the front steps at night with him once the kids are dreaming and talking about our days.  I enjoy the “easy” and I prepare for all the “difficult” that’s going to come along with all these milestones.  But I’m going to promise myself that I keep enjoying the NOW the moment because no matter what this moment matters.

Happy 6 months Charlie B!

I want to see those smiles for all the days to come.  My sweet love birds.

Love,

C